I Love You Jill!

“Nobody can fully understand the meaning of love unless he’s owned a dog. A dog can show you more honest affection with a flick of his tail than a man can gather through a lifetime of handshakes.” – Gene Hill

I remember bringing her home. She was so small and cuddly with her tiny paws and soft white fur. She bounced around the room with eyes flashing and ear flopping. When I sat down to watch TV, she would hop on my lap, looking for attention. She never asked for anything more than for me to pat her head so she could go to sleep next to me.

Dogs come into our lives to teach us about love, they depart to teach us about loss. A new dog never replaces an old dog, it merely expands the heart.

I will never forget this day when my Jill passed away.

Jill.... Yes that was her name.

My snow white..

Yesterday, almost at age of 12, she stopped eating and drinking since morning. I took her for a bath and deworming to CP Vet and afterwards while I was bringing her back, she could barely walk.

I put a milk on her nose, which she loved but she didn't even lick it off. She wasn’t looking good. I went out for couple of hours and my daughter, Hemanya, called me and told the Jill is spitting blood.

I immediately rushed her to the Vet and After some tests, doctor told me that she was suffering from internal injury in stomach and oesophagus and they were doing whatever was in their hands. She was on drip with antibiotics and meds and oxygen mask for hours.

After some treatment and diagnosis, the doctors found that her haemoglobin and platelets has gone down drastically and the internal injury is causing her to ooze blood and since the blood has gone very thin, she can’t heal the internal injury.

Status :  Critical
She hardly drank some water and milk, but she was indeed in pain as she barely could breathe and was hyperventilating the moment oxygen mask was removed. She was given coagulant to and antibiotic through IV along with dextrose, but nothing seemed working. I admitted her to the hospital through emergency early last night, the same process started again, we all were struggling to stabilise her and make the blood stop but couldn’t. She was pale, weak, her stomach turned, ears and skin were whitened, and she had too much trouble breathing. I could see the pain in her eyes, and I am sure she was looking the same into mine.

She breathes her last.

I can feel her presence everywhere. Under my bed, on my couch, in my balcony looking at the on-goers and on my lap. I miss cuddling with her. I somehow managed to take a little sleep last night.

She had taught me that dying was part of living and I knew there was nothing I could do for her.

Jill was almost 12 years old, which is pretty much the average life expectancy for a Spitz , but it is still going to hit me very hard...really hard..!!

It is very difficult; I get teary eyes when I look at her pictures or her leash or her utensils and I realise she is no longer there, but I must keep going.

I don't think anything or anyone can replace her. She was unique, and I don't want to replace her. Maybe someday I'll be ready for another doggie, but it will never be able to replace my Jill...my snow-white..

When i needed a hand, I found your paw..

Thank you for coming into my life and giving me joy.. thank you for loving me and receiving my love in return...thank you for the memories I will cherish forever... Thank you for everything

RIP Jillu.. missing you so much…

And you know what…

I love you so much…

The misery of keeping a dog is his dying so soon. But, to be sure, if she lived for fifty years and then died, what would become of me?” – Sir Walter Scott